Flower etiquette - how to gift flowers correctly?

In Poland, there is hardly a more universal gift than flowers. They delight a loved one, but they are also perfect for a mother, grandmother, friend, uncle, or even a teacher. Flowers fit almost every occasion – birthdays, name days, holidays, family events, or even when someone is unwell. They are also a wonderful gift without any occasion at all. But giving flowers requires a bit of sensitivity, because the wrong choice of flowers can easily turn into a faux pas.

Even if you don’t personally believe in symbolism and consider it superstition, the person receiving the flowers might feel differently. To avoid awkward situations, it’s good to know that yellow can symbolize jealousy, while red stands for passion. For example, if a man gives a bouquet of red roses and carnations, it should be to his beloved – not to a boss he doesn’t particularly like, as she could easily misinterpret the gesture.

It’s also wise to avoid certain flowers such as gerberas, calla lilies, or chrysanthemums, which in Poland are strongly associated with funerals and grave arrangements. Even the most beautiful bouquet made with these blooms could be misunderstood and seen as inappropriate.

It’s a myth that an even number of flowers in a bouquet brings bad luck. The real reason behind the tradition is that odd numbers simply look better in arrangements. This matters most when there are just a few stems – for example, three roses always look nicer than two. When the bouquet contains many flowers – dozens, for instance – the exact count no longer matters. Still, in some circles, even numbers are traditionally used for funeral arrangements, which is why it’s generally safer to choose an odd number for festive occasions.

An exception are anniversary or milestone bouquets, where the number of flowers has symbolic meaning: for example, 10 red roses for a 10th wedding anniversary, or 18 tulips for an 18th birthday. In such cases, the flower count becomes part of the gift itself.

Single flowers and bouquets should always be handed over with the stems pointing down and the blooms up, after removing any wrapping paper or foil. The idea is to highlight the beauty of the flowers. The only exception is when the wrapping is decorative and forms part of the bouquet’s design. If the flowers are a gift from a couple, it is customary for the man to present them. Traditionally, you first remove your coat and shoes, then greet the hosts with a handshake, and only afterwards hand over the bouquet.

How to give flowers – 8 simple rules

• Always hand the bouquet with the stems down (flowers up).

• Even the most beautiful and elegant wrapping paper should be removed before entering. The only exception is transparent cellophane – this decorative touch can be left on.

• Give flowers with your right hand.

• Before handing flowers to the host or celebrant, remember to take off your coat or outerwear.

• Don’t hand over flowers while standing on the doorstep or still in the hallway. The best moment is after you’ve taken off your outerwear and been invited into the room where the dinner or celebration will take place.

• Offer flowers after greeting the hosts. While shaking hands, keep the bouquet in your left hand, then switch it to your right before presenting it.

• Who should give the flowers? If a woman is accompanied by a man, it’s the man who should give the flowers to the hostess. The exception is when the host is celebrating a birthday or name day – then it’s the woman who should present the bouquet.

• Don’t stay silent while handing over flowers – say a few words! Offer birthday or name day wishes, congratulations, or a compliment to the hostess.

Cut flowers are considered a universal gift in Poland – not too formal and easy to care for. Potted plants, on the other hand, should only be given to people you know well, for example, if you know they love having lots of plants at home or have just moved into a new place. In such cases, always make sure the plant comes in a nice cover or basket – never give it in a plain plastic pot.

Flowers are also a popular birthday or name day gift for men, next to elegant bottles of wine or gift baskets. There are situations where a bouquet for a man is especially recommded – e.g. when given as a gesture of respect or gratitude to a doctor or professor. Such a gift is considered perfectly acceptable, as flowers have never been and are not seen as a bribe.